2004-06-05 - 9:05 p.m.

The phantom charges dropped off my account.

Which is a good thing...because Dad might be getting evicted for non-payment of rent.

sigh.

I TOLD HIM SO, that moving to Santa Barbara was DUMB! His rent there is THREE times what it was here. Here he had jobs. He managed here. He can't manage there. I wish I didn't care...but I do. Seeing him fail over and over is just the saddest thing.

There's a little bit of money left in the Dad Emergency Fund that my sisters and I set up a few years ago, almost enough for a full month's rent. He wrote some stupid letter to the landlord so now they know he has no job, and will probably not renew his lease whenever it comes up. So, he needs to start looking into subsisized veterans' housing, and needs to get social security (both of which things we've been trying to get him to do since that last time we paid his rent...in May).

Nothing we say or do will make him change, and I'm sick of feeding his habit. There's no methadone for him, though - it's going to have to be cold turkey. And I hate that. I don't want him to suffer. But dammit, I want him to fucking GET A JOB, ANY JOB. He's been out of work since January. Work at the GDMF grocery store. SOMETHING. *sobs* I hate this! And Karen is freaking out since she's the one out there, and she herself is in NO shape to even cope with this.